This quote caught Sherrie's attention today. It is on my wall facing me as I work, to remind me that as a human, as a mum, as an entrepreneur, I will fall. Every single day. What makes the difference is what I do when I fall - do I wallow, cry, or get back up? The truth is, I do all 3. After all, falling is never easy, sometimes painful & almost always a lesson to learn.
As a mum, I think I fall the most often. I wasn't always the happy mum. I was very reluctant to have children until I felt I was psychologically ready. Perhaps it was my own experiences growing up, and also my time as a teacher observing how parenting can make such a difference (both positive and negative) that made me worry if I could ever be a good mum. The thing is, one can never be fully ready for the journey that is to be a mum.
But maybe that is the point. To be 100% ready means I would miss out on the many learning lessons that occur as I fall. Today, for instance, I had lots of work to do, and Sherrie came home from work early. I so wanted to spend quality time 100% focused on her, but somehow had to multitask. In between crafting emails & designing powerpoints, we sewed a bag for Zoey (her birthday is coming). She kept wanting me to play with her, and I had to keep telling her that I had work to do. She was getting frustrated: seeing me physically be around but mentally not focused on her... and I was distracted trying to get things done and feeling more irritable every time she asked, "Are you ready now?"
Even as we played badminton in the park, my mind was thinking about the workshop I had to prepare for, the email automation I had to set in motion, the posters I had to design. Shortly after, I dropped her off for piano lessons. Only then in the quietness of the car did I realise: I had fallen. And she had been very patient.
So when I picked her up, I said, "This friday i'll clear my schedule so I can spend the whole afternoon with you. No work, ok?" To which she teared up "Ok mummy." She was so touched I would spare time for her. And in that moment, I learnt my lesson.
Rising up is quiet glory for me. It requires humility to admit you have fallen and courage to try again. But to me, what would be worse is never falling, not recognizing you are falling and having no bumps in the journey. What fun would there be in that?